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RUNNING -
What grapefruit?★Manman, 02'12'93 Eccentric, Burtonized, self-claimed monophobic. Dancer, photographer & Pocky collector. THROUGH THE MONSOON.
TO THE END OF TIME.
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Saturday, December 19, 2009 @ 7:25 PM
Summary of today.
19th December: 1. VAN came to visit us after ballet. Happy happy. She looks so pretty (though still kid-ish) now, with her semi-curled hair and things like that. Was quite surprised she didn't dye her hair? HAHA. She didn't get souvenirs though. And I don't have The Book so I couldn't pass it to her. Sad. :( 2. CEN wasn't around to see VAN either, so I sent her an sms and I'm hoping she'll feel guilty. :) 3. 4. Met up with 5. Watched Avatar with Qing x2 & Pamm. :D It was super nice haha, I really love the story and everything, I don't think I'll survive but I want to live in Pandora damnit. I never liked the humans from the start. Them and their stupid destroying idea to get stupid minerals to sell wtf. YAY FOR LOVING MOTHER EARTH. "They have killed their Mother." So true. The Mother on this Earth is already dead, so why do we still bother to spread environmental messages amongst these complacent and unloving beings? Don't get me wrong, I love Earth, I've always wanted to recycle stuff, save water, save the trees and things like that. But the way things are going, our Mother is already dead. It's too late to apologise, y'know? We're all doomed to die for what we've done so far. We're doomed for an horrific end, because of our lack of care and love for the planet. This is what we have carved for ourselves, and when you carve into stone, it cannot be undone. Tell me, how much recycling CAN you do, really? You deplete less resources, but that's not going to get back your 1000-year old tree that you've cut for your retarded exam papers, is it not? In the end, what's done is done, we can't ever get back that lovely Earth that once was. WHICH BRINGS ME TO MY POINT that we should just live life to our fullest now. 2012 may come true, it may not, but it doesn't matter. Either way, we all die. Our Earth is as screwed up as it is. The balance of Nature has long been destroyed. I love Mother Nature, so really.. My idea of the apocalypse is for everything to be gone in a flash. Everyone just disappears. Everything's gone, no pain, no nothing. Then the Earth restarts for the better. Let the animals flourish, let the grass grow. Then we co-exist with them. THAT's the Earth that I want. I promise, this isn't influenced from Avatar. I've always had this in my mind but never typed it out or shared it with anyone. But since I was talking about Avatar which is IMO very pro-Mother Nature anyway, I might as well say it now than never. Labels: friends, online, personal Sunday, December 13, 2009 @ 1:44 AM
SO09. ♥
SO09 is made of win!!! :D My second concert ever, and it was totally (okay maybe not but still) awesome and worth it. To be honest, many things threatened to ruin the night :( 1. Location. I'm sure we all know what's wrong about THAT location.. 2. Sitting on grass. Argh. 3. Mad rush of people that nearly caused a stampede. 4. NO AIR! I can't breathe! 5. They threw away my water bottle so they could cheat me of $2. Okay and yeah that's about all I suppose. I am superbly amazed, too, because this is the first time I have gone to Fort Canning, AND return home WITHOUT a single insect bite!! :O *happy* Though some greenish bug landed on me twice, many ants dropped on my hands and refused to die, that was just about all the insects I saw for the entire night. Which is, well, nice, considering what sort of weird creepies I have seen there before. But yes, SO09 was still awesome. Huishan iluuuuu thanks for the superb night!! ♥ First was the Miso Festival! :D Very nice. I appreciate how the audience was being quiet and respectful, even if that wasn't what they were looking forward to and wasn't close to anything of their interest. Anyway loved the drum dancers, their movements were really synchronized and captivating, it was so awesome I felt so desperate to go on stage to perform and dance again, haha. The pompom thing was cute, too. Awesome skill. Drawing Room! AWESOMEEEE. Loved this performance so much. They started off with some really cool moves and things like that in sync with the song, then later one of them started to draw with charcoal (I believe) and did it like within 5 minutes flat or something. First was some chinese painting of a gorge that, literally, lit up and started to 'flow' (!!!). Next was Napoleon! (Or at least, I am too lazy to check wiki, and thus I believe I should be right). I was quite bemused because when he was drawing Napoleon, everyone around was like, "Oh cool. Is he drawing a pirate? No wait, it's a man.. Huh? A soldier?" Lol. But the pose, expressions and things like that were literally screaming out to me that that man's sitting on a horse. Plus, his legs were really short and ummm, yeah. *Feels proud anyway* JJ Crew were terribly freaking super awesome end of story :'DDDD If I remember correctly, Mario was next! I kind of forgot her name (sorry T_T) but she did a few stages with Mario which were pretty awesome. She sings so terribly good live, and she can rap (though mildly) too! :D Really awesome. Not to mention she's also very pretty. Don't have good photos because I thought taking photos of the screen would be better than pointing at the stage (of which I was proven wrong later) so yeah. Mario was really good too, awesome rapping and English keke. Sad about the shades though.. Next was Ji Su! His singing was so, so so good. Huishan was super fangirly and happy haha. His voice is seriously very awesome. :) T-Max was fantastic!! :D I remember reading on this particular forum about how TM is like, a unique korean boy group, that they have a style different from that of other boy groups. Watching them perform live, I do admit, I really feel that way about them too. I can't really pin-point what it is, but they don't feel like your typical boy group. (Or men group) They were just.. in their own league and things like that :D And trust me, I don't even bother about BOF so I've never known TM prior to their airport arrival two days back. They did loads of fanservice again as well, and they all tried really hard to speak in English so as to accomodate to the audience. Really awesome :D Love it when idols do fanservice~ :) FTI! To be honest, I was quite shocked because I had (and so had most people) expected them to be the last performers - y'know, save the best for the last. Not to mention most people go SO09 for the sake of FTI, so it'd only make sense that they'd be the last performers right? Or something like that? FTI were great, though I feel guilty of not taking pictures of the drummer. I mean, I TRIED, but that stupid steel pole to support the stage was right in front of my view of the drummer. And so were his cymbals. In the end I managed to get a half-face photo of him. Which is, well, the best I can do. -_- HK had two super tiny buns on the top of his head haha :D I can't help but find it so cute. JJ! He became my bias after airport day, but I think I've officially got a new bias.. then again, I still don't know them well enough so whatever. :P HK reminds me a lot of GD. Not just the hair, of course, but the showmanship, emotions into a song and most of all this air of aloofness of the sort. Idk, there's just that sort of aura from both of them haha. BEG! BEG! BEG!!!!!! Talk about saving the best for the last. #1 - SIGN OMG THE STARTING WAS AWESOME!!!! I know Sign is an awesome song, but seriously, watching them live is just... wow. They're performances are flawless more often than not, honestly. Their voices are so strong and spot-on, and their dance moves are subtle but jumpy enough to fit in with the music. So awesome. Okay yes the starting was awesome because I NEVER knew that the bass for Sign was SO loud! Very cool when it started playing. :D Btw M is like some rapping queen or something. So awesome especially how she drummed up the audience's cheers in the later performances (below) #2 - L.O.V.E This was TOTALLY unexpected! :D I think it's my very first time watching them perform LOVE. It was so good~~ Love this song (other than the plain MV made for it..) so it was nice to see them perform this song, too. #3 - You Raise Me Up I can die in peace now, kthxbai. Ever since I heard their performance of this song on YT, all I've ever wished for is for them to perform this song LIVE. AND GUESS WHAT I GOT MY WISH WHOOOOO~ They really performed this live, it was so so so so SO good I could've cried. The only thing is that M didn't sing her part (though she sings well~) but did a dedication speech instead. Oh and, so many people thought N's part was the end of the song which made me quite sad, because they totally missed J's awesome adlibs right after that :C :C Live performance is no joke, srsly. Love this one to bits. #4 - Abracadabra! Before this started, M started speaking on behalf of BEG (coz' she's the only one who speaks English well :D) about how they started out as an unknown group and it was really hard for them, etc. and things like that. It makes me feel so sad to hear them talk about it :C then M asked the audience, "Do you know our first album? Have you listened to it?" and I could tell that not everyone in the crowd replied. But proud BEG fans (count me) still shouted "YES" anyway. Because yes, I do listen to their first album too. It was very heartbreaking to hear them say it, honestly :C they're as old as BB, but they were nowhere as famous until this song came along. I am, however, glad that they have so much attention now. They totally deserve it for all the hard work they've put in. I just hope people recognize them for their TALENT, and not just their current concept etc. etc. etc. Okay yes back to the song. VERY AWESOME TOO (Sorry orz vocabulary = limited today) :D I can't remember most of it because I only remember fretting about not having enough photos of N so I just tried my best to get more photos of her, and yep. Very nice performance once again :D oh the swagger. #5 (ENCORE) - How Come So awesome~~~ I think it was staged, but having the audience shout ENCORE and having idols fulfill their fans wish is a nice thing to both parties, isn't it? Though it may be staged, idols still feel appreciative and loved that fans cheer for them to come back, without needing anyone to ask them to start the 'encore' cheer or anything. And fans, on the other hand, feel loved that their idols are willing to come and perform one more song, staged or not. How self-fulfilling and nice to both parties, don't you think? Very nice performance. Before this, I've never had a bias for BEG. I think I've just found it today - J keke. Okay time to sleep. Btw portable toilets are cool. They have a mirror, a sink and even SOAP! I never knew. Had a superb night today, though the wait was long (and damn tiring), it was worth it in the end. Big thank you to Huishan & her bro who kept looking out for me (and finding my jacket when I totally forgot about it hahah) and for finding such an awesome space for taking photos (last) night :D :D Time to go finish up my 1000 puzzle. SO09 (+BEG) (+other artistes) for the win. ♥ Labels: friends, online, photography, specialday Friday, December 11, 2009 @ 4:16 PM
Today sucked. And it isn't even Sunday.
Don't feel like elaborating, since I've already "blogged" it in my head. You see, if you remember well, whenever I'm walking by myself/pissed/upset/etc, I tend to "blog" these things in my head. That is, I think about them, and phrase them accordingly as I would if I were to turn on the computer, log in to Blogger and type them out. That's "blogging". It is also known as the equivalent of blogging in my head. So most of the time, after I've "blogged", I'm too lazy to blog here (as in type it out) again. Which is the case now, yes, I am too lazy to elaborate anymore. Just want to say that I feel very disheartened and disappointed. And possibly angry, I don't know. It's not like I want to be pissed at someone, but you know, being human and having feelings and things like that.. it's not really something that's easy to control or hold back. We are born to sin, I presume. So yes, though I'm trying my best not to blame anyone, since, after all, this is more of my fault than anyone's, I still feel a little upset and angry at other people. But whatever, it's not like I really care now anyway. Let me replay the scenario for you. I take the train from Somerset to City Hall, change to the green line to Tanah Merah, then go to the airport. Took about one hour in total. Awesome, isn't it? Couldn't contact anyone for whatever freaking heck reason, so just took the skytrain to T1 from T2. Still couldn't freaking contact anyone there, so stoned for who freaking knows how long at T1 before someone finally replied me, only to say what I had been speculating after arriving in T1 just awhile ago. Took the skytrain back to T2, then train back to Somerset. Feeling very upset for going out for no apparent reason, so walked to Cine to buy more Ceylon Tea (that hopefully, would make me feel better) then dropped by my (now) favourite shopping centre to buy bubble tea from the same girl who always makes them. Which made me happier. Throughout the journey home, I listened to the English folder for once, despite the random Girlfriend and Slim Shady that would pop up in the track list. But, seriously, listening to the folder with korean and jap songs just made me very sad, because majority of that folder is filled with songs from a particular girl group, of whose arrival I have just missed. Yes, I am majorly upset. Thank goodness I am still a student. I love student fare. So yes anyway wasted two freaking hours just travelling to the airport for nothing. If Eunice was coming back today it would've been better, 'coz I could've at least gone there to welcome her or something. Or something. But no, she's coming back tomorrow. Anyway, I sssssssssss.... okay no. I am definitely NOT going to trust my head in any situation anymore. So many times, I've had this gut feeling which actually turns out to be the right decision in the situation. But yet each time, I THINK of something else, so I decide to follow my head instead. Which sucks, because what my head thinks is always wrong. I'm not that smart. I need to trust my feelings more. :( Because just last night, there were two choices. 11.30am or 2.30pm. People said 2.30pm, which was what made me keep thinking they would come then. Yet I had this gut feeling that they would definitely come at the 11am one. I don't know why, I just had a feeling that they would (and no, not because the organiser said it or whatever. C'mon, there weren't any flights from Seoul that was confirmed at 11am, so don't ask me how I feel that they would still come at that time). So yes, I don't know why, I just had that gut feel, and I told Yee. And guess what? My gut feeling was right. This sucks, okay. This majorly sucks. Not the wasting-time part, or the fact that I could've wasted less time part, or the fact that I missed their arrival (okay this sucks), but it sucks most that once again, I choose to trust my head and what I THINK instead of what I feel, and again, it has led me to make the wrong decision, the wrong choice, the wrong move. Inevitable consequences. Oh forget it, I'm quitting fandom tomorrow after the concert. Too depressing to continue, lmao. P.S. Oh yeah I miss MDD a lot. You know how people say you have to get used to losing your friends, because over time they just change, they forget you, they say they'll stay in touch but never do? Yeah. But for MDD, it's just different. Sure everyone may have different personalities, be of different backgrounds and age, but in the end, they never fail to cheer me up. So yes, I am looking forward to the 19th. :D Labels: fangirl, friends, personal Tuesday, December 8, 2009 @ 1:51 PM
HOW COME?
 Adsakldjsalkhgjg. Why is it when I have nothing to do and is rotting at home dying to ask someone to go out with, Everyone is apparently NOT free to go out? And why is it that when now, I'm super busy like crazy having so many things to do, Postponing so many plans just for the sake of other stuff, People are suddenly so free to go out? Irritating. I haven't even got started on the B. Heart series, or Alphabet Story. ;A; That, and I still want to read my Grimm fairy tales, thank you. SO SIENZ OKAYZ. Labels: miscellaneous Wednesday, December 2, 2009 @ 1:05 AM
Let Me Hear Your Voice.
 Koe Wo Kikasete If we become honest, surely We'll be able to understand one other Please open your heart Happy belated birthday to Applescented (by a month). Was too busy with O's then, but I'm free now, so yeah. I missed a call from Unknown. I feel bad because I didn't mean to miss it. But I did. Like what Cookie said, I hope I'll grow more mature and understanding now, And that I'll be able to handle situations and people better. I want to become a better person and to help others in a good way. I know I'm a very childish person. So many times, I've hurt so many people unintentionally, simply because of my immature state and lack of ability to make better judgments. But trust me, I want to learn from them. So please, watch over me. ♥ Labels: personal Monday, November 30, 2009 @ 10:10 PM
I feel like hanging up those shoes.
Ballet is killing me. It's tiring and I always dread the start of each lesson for some reason. Yet after each lesson I feel so much more accomplished, and yearning for more. It's weird and very difficult to comprehend, but hey, I've already paid the price. So I'll just stay on for the sake of it. I don't have a choice now, anyway, since I have a bond till April. But I'll just work and try my very best. After all that's the only thing I can do now, isn't it? To enjoy the best of what's left. Laozhi, if you ever read this miraculously, don't you dare quit ballet without me. ------------------------ Drunk on sleep. What on earth is everyone so "busy" with that they don't have time to catch up as friends, or go out, or something? I miss everyone terribly. It doesn't matter who. I miss a lot of people. Heck I miss a lot of people from far long ago though I'm sure they've probably forgotten about me, or my existence. But I miss them too, because they are such valuable friends that I can never give. I miss everyone. I hate rotting at home. The only time I get out of home is to go for ballet, which is like thrice a week. Other than that I absolutely have nothing else to do. Okay, I have things to do, but I can't do them now because I don't have the heart to do so. I want to go out and buy stuff, but everyone's either "busy", "no time", "no money" or "looking for a job". Do you have any idea how tough it is to do things by yourself? Puri Gorota. No human can live on their own, or by themselves. It just doesn't work that way. I feel so bored right now that though my birthday is a mere 2 days away, I'm not even the least bit excited for it. I don't even know what am I gonna do that day, or what I want to do. Where to go, what to eat, what to buy, what to do? I can't give a heck right now. If anyone out there is bored at home too, please sms/msn me or whatever. We need to catch up. If its real we'll make it through Guess not. @ 7:27 AM
I am utterly wasting away my holiday.
Doing your own photoshoot is hard. 1. Hair & Makeup. Do at home, people see, people laugh. Mother see, thinks I'm crazy and I die. 2. Clothes. Limited clothes at home, difficult to spiff up something suitable. 3. Time. 1 hour counting preparation? Not enough. Keep in mind this is me, here, running back and forth from the camera and back to in front of the lens, back and forth, back and forth. 4. Tripod. Stupid thing takes a bloody long time to set-up properly. 5. Lighting. Sure, I know the right time to shoot, but CAN I shoot at that time? I think not. 6. People at home. Too many people, too difficult to try. 7. Room. Can't lock the door even when its my own room. 8. I can't spiff up any other reasons but its difficult, OKEH. So... like. Anyone wants to model / shoot my crazy concepts for me? I'll pay you (with a cookie). I'm serious. A Subway cookie. T_T *desperate* ---------------- P.S. CRYSTAL OR LOLLIPOP!? I think I'm still gonna get Lollipop coz it looks nicer and honestly the Crystal doesn't sound as nice as when Jiayue told me about it hahah. Like, only the keypad is transparent. But I only want the RED lollipop :( Labels: school |